Body appreciation

Dear Daring Readers,

I hope that, like me, you have found a way to get through this part of 2020 and stay relatively sane. Given that it feels to me like this period of isolation has lasted a year, it is time to have a new (ab)normal setup in life. I am writing and posting this during week 9 of staying at home and socializing online, all of this knowing my job has been erased by this crisis and will not be there waiting for me when the lockdown is lifted. Also, traveling to visit family and my partner is unavailable for now and for foreseeable future.

In the next post, I will explore a few things that are making my journey easier, but first, there are some ugly things getting uglier during lockdown.

Since the very beginning, I have seen some very worrisome trends online. I am sure you have seen all of this too. There has been a barrage of posts and memes saying that if you stay home you are privileged, which is totally true for many, but not all, insinuating that staying home is easy and safe. This is incredibly dismissive of the problems of the people who might really be struggling with domestic violence, poverty, addiction, mental health issues, and many others. I think realistically very few people are thriving right now without the usual support system and services, and it makes total sense given the situation. It triggers major anxiety in many who struggled before (hand raised here!) and people who are new to this.

What worries me the most is that we are not going to take the consequences of all of this seriously. That it will all be about money, jobs and the virus and that mental health will be overlooked like many times before. Many other consequences are indeed unforeseen or unclear as of now; a massive negative impact on mental health globally is not.

Most of us will not know what was going on in someone else’s life at this time of crisis for years or decades to come, and some will never say anything about the pain loneliness added then to preexisting problems. Some might tell us years from now about eating disorders and body dysphoria that worsened in 2020.

And this ties into the topic of this post: body appreciation at a time of crisis.

By now, you have probably seen many body negative memes about gaining weight during the pandemic and eating non-stop. Calorie counting posts have exploded and suggestions on how to exercise to gain the right to eat, or make up for meals eaten, keep showing up everywhere on social media. Apparently, a pandemic makes you lazy and hungry, really? Be careful! Shame alert! All of that seems a way to share the experience of overeating and laugh about it, or maybe a reminder of good habits, yet all it really does is create shame and spread it. Do not participate, especially if you have an unhealthy relationship with food, just hide the content or block it.

Basic self-care starts with deciding to eliminate anything on social media that makes you look at your body in a cruel way and doubt your worth. Remember that you are not a passive consumer of social media content, you get to choose what you see on your feed and what you actually pay attention to now, and at all times.

To this end I am going to give some suggestions of wholesome and helpful accounts to follow, if you want to be flooded with good content that will give you reminders of how to be gentle and kind during this crisis. This is also to give you a reminder that not being OK is OK, and that there are resources out there to help.

Check out Grombre if you are thinking of going grey for many stories of freedom, sassiness and liberation. I dig their theme and I am not even going grey yet!

Right now, I am actually working on a project to challenge the ideas in the memes and affirm once again that I am gladly semi bald and happy with my body. This is not to say that those depressing jokes need a reaction other than eliminating them from view, it is to honor the fact that we have all seen them and some damage has already been done.

Regardless of your current relationship with your body, I would like you to spend a minute thinking about all the things your body does every single day. Your body is amazing. It is just a fact. Considering the stress it is under right now, your body is performing all of its functions at its best capacity and I have a lot of respect for it. It is our home and the only thing we truly possess.

Let’s make it practical! One of the things that I have been doing to feel better and let loose is throw solo dance parties in my room. Choose a song and dance to the best of your abilities while absolutely no one is watching! Yes! I think we need reminders of how good it can feel to be in our bodies and escape everyday fear.

Heavy heart and sassy vibes,

Dare to be b@ld